Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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