i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
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After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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