but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
