I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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