How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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