Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
