I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
