this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
