Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Boobs are out for the taking
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
