No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
