I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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