entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize