Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
