I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
