but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
