Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
