Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
