yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Randomize
