im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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