I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I love you. Go after that dick
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Randomize