Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
