Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
