I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Barsexuality is the new black.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
