Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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