ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
