is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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