"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
