Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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