So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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