i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
