Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize