ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
My vagina just recognized that song.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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