I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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