I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
