u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Your penis caused this!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
