yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
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I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I enjoy the company of your penis
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize