So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize