DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
