it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
My vagina just clenched in fear
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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