Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
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Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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