I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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