Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
