I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
