Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
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