youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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