So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
