Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
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i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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