If that was your dad, he is hot
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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