Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed. http://tfl.nu/cgfh
  Replies (40) Good night (6266) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet http://tfl.nu/lao3
  Replies (55) Good night (2634) Bad night (4865)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You're such a slut.

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I prefer opportunist.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): You're such a slut. (318): I prefer opportunist. http://tfl.nu/49c1
  Replies (27) Good night (6520) Bad night (929)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight. (1-406): Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it. http://tfl.nu/p8t9
  Replies (10) Good night (3382) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates http://tfl.nu/tadv
  Replies (3) Good night (1049) Bad night (2399)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God. http://tfl.nu/decj
  Replies (11) Good night (969) Bad night (3374)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out. http://tfl.nu/twgf
  Replies (3) Good night (1893) Bad night (673)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered. http://tfl.nu/lz30
  Replies (8) Good night (504) Bad night (1211)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised? http://tfl.nu/o7ko
  Replies (4) Good night (757) Bad night (376)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked. http://tfl.nu/ufw5
  Replies (3) Good night (1242) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life. http://tfl.nu/s141
  Replies (3) Good night (752) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird? http://tfl.nu/9vh0
  Replies (8) Good night (1263) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  WTF DUDE?

  (323): View more from California

  Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): WTF DUDE? (323): Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this http://tfl.nu/ooar
  Replies (6) Good night (1067) Bad night (421)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket http://tfl.nu/sq21
  Replies (2) Good night (607) Bad night (274)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck. http://tfl.nu/0395
  Replies (3) Good night (693) Bad night (196)

Randomize