I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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