My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
